Romanticon 2012 Photos: Glass Dildos, Hot Shirtless Men, and Soap

My total Romanticon wine bottle count is three. Erotic romance has been very, very good to me. Also in the frame are a mask and some beads from the Last Night of Your Life party.

Here I am (trust me, that’s me) with Ace. Ace is a great-looking guy, as are all the Cavemen, but again, I had to crop out both our heads because of the uptight folks at my job. My mom wonders why I don’t just pixelate my face, so that everyone is not punished for my poor career choices. I told her that was an artistic choice on the part of the blogger.

Mom, on the other hand, is happy to appear in the frame. Here she is with two hot new friends at the Pajama Bingo Party.

And here she is with the new Alpha Caveman, Nick. Mom has just won a bingo game, and Nick is verifying the numbers.

About three games later, Mom says, “Oh, Lex! You know who you could have gotten a picture of? You should have gotten a picture of Nick when he was over here!” Yeah. Mom was in her own little Caveman-induced fog.

This is Mom with Giorgio. Told you he was cute!

And here I am with Ryan. I have a really blurry photo of Ryan all by himself, which I had hoped to post here so that you can see that amazing face of his. He invited me to join him for a photo of both of us. I was trying to figure out how to avoid cropping both of us out, and he looked at me, gently, like, “See, now I just think you’re being silly.”

I told him that if people saw both of us in the frame they would have all sorts of questions. He said, “Yes. They’re going to say, ‘What are you both doing in your pajamas at this hour?’ This is what we *want.*”

We do want that!

This is Rodney at the annual Pajama Bingo Party, about to give a lucky winner a lap dance.

At our Last Night of Your Life party, I got this photo of Rodney wearing a garment made almost entirely of peacock feathers.

And here’s Christian in the same outfit. See? It’s nice when I don’t have to crop myself out, isn’t it? Particularly because Christian is easily head and shoulders taller than I am. Cropping myself out would have cut him in half and done everyone a disservice, right?

Original Caveman CJ is below from our Last Night of Your Life party. I felt bad for turning up in jeans, but if there is one thing I can be sure of about the last night of my life, it is this — I am going to be comfortable.

This is the crew from Cleveland Exotic Dance, looking awesome at the Sunday SEXporium. Those ladies can move!

I scored these two glass dildo keychains from the souvenir room because I couldn’t decide between them. Now I can’t decide what keys to put them on. It seems a shame to put them on my dull, everyday keys, but if part of my philosophy is that every day can be a little sexy, that’s exactly where they should go, right?

And now, my story about the soap.

The swag tables are a favorite destination for me and Mom every year at Romanticon. We both take a long, slow pass over the tables, and then we carry our loot upstairs and compare notes. After the first pass, she showed me a pair of nice, big green jelly candies in a cellophane envelope. I was bummed — I love jelly candy — but I resolved to score my own before the conference was over. It took a little while, but I finally grabbed some nice lemon-lime jelly candy on Sunday afternoon and went right upstairs before Pajama Bingo to eat them.

I popped a jelly candy into my mouth and started chewing. Hmm. Not as sweet as I’d expected. But then my palate is not so sophisticated. I kept chewing. Maybe it was a more subtle lemon taste. More lemon juice than lemon candy.

Then I thought, “You know what this tastes like?”

I went into the bathroom and spat the jelly candy into my hand. Then I rubbed it between my hands and got fragrant lather.

It took me about 20 minutes to rinse the soap out of my mouth, and I was hiccuping soap bubbles for much longer than that! But I kept my sliver of soap with the teeth marks in it.

Reality hit me like a fist this morning. How can Romanticon be over so soon? I had to pay for breakfast. I was on the elevator at work several times today and saw not a single Caveman. All I have are photos. And a story idea. And plans for next year. And some chewed-up soap, three bottles of wine, loads of chocolate, a bunch of books, and a pair of dildo keychains.

You’re right, it’s not that bad. I’m just upset right now that there are no Cavemen on my elevator. In time, I will learn to live with that.


    1. You’re right, of course; we will push forward through this week and the next, until it’s October again. For today, though, I will strive not to look so disappointed when the elevator doors open.

      Lol. Baby steps.


    1. Lol. My brother said he was impressed by the amount of time and effort I put into eating soap, when perhaps someone else would have given up on it immediately. What can I say? I’m not one to throw in the towel right away.


  1. OH MY Goodness! Love the soap story. That will always be a priceless way to remember this RomantiCon! As for the Cavemen, yes it is sad that we do not get to “see” them regularly on a daily basis….BUT look at the memories and pictures that are priceless!!! Cherish them!! I do daily!!

    Thank you for an AWESOME post with great pics! (Understand the issue with work.)


    1. I kind of think I should move all the photos somewhere more secure than this phone. Then I get all distracted by the photos themselves (hello, slideshow!) and I lose track of what I’m doing. Maybe this is a weekend project. 🙂

      As for the soap, well, it is much better at being soap than at being jelly candy.


    1. Thanks! I still have that piece of soap; my efforts to eat it didn’t do it much damage. It smells so good! I wish I had a larger bar.

      Maybe I’ll touch base with AJ Llewellyn and find out where she got it…


  2. I LOVED the soap story. You are one persistent woman in all matters, but to have actually washed your own mouth out with soap is too just hysterical. I hope I get to see those keyrings in person very soon as well as the “complete” photos. So glad you had a good time and, honestly, I’m thinking I need to start a Romanticon fund.


    1. You want to hear something really funny? That soap is shaped like a slice of lime. It came in a package of two; the second one is on my dining table in the cellophane. When I see it on the table, my first thought is still ‘jelly candy.’ Someday, this stubbornness will work out for me.

      The Romanticon 2013 site is already up! You should totally go and check it out. My calendar is already marked and I am looking for something to wear to the parties!

      Those keychains are so cool. If only I had the ornate key to a secret room or something to put on them and … dammit. Another story idea. 🙂


    1. Aren’t they gorgeous? I could not resist them; they’re just so pretty.

      I haven’t used them yet — for any purpose 😉 — because I’m a little afraid of breaking them and cutting myself on the sharp pieces. Am I silly to be afraid of that?

      You have an absolutely beautiful online shop! A lovely inventory and lots of terrific, friendly advice — that’s my sort of store.


      1. Go on… give them a test drive! There’s no way they will break inside you. Once you’ve tried glass I guarantee you will never use anything else 🙂

        Thank you so much for your kind words about the shop. As you will have seen, we are still in the process of building and slowly adding products we feel are the very best. Because of this we will never have a huge inventory, since our focus is purely on quality not quantity.

        With warm wishes,

        Jenny xx


      2. Well, I’m definitely intrigued. It does seem a shame to have such lovely things on hand and not be using them.

        You really do have some lovely things there — good to know during this festive shopping season!


  3. I’m not sure how I forgot to comment on this the first time I read the post, but HOLY HANNAH!! So. Dang. Funny!! And even funnier upon second read, somehow. You totally made my day. And I’m about to make our publisher’s day by sending her the link… 😉 Welcome to EC, Alexa!!


    1. I’m glad I made your day! Will Raelene think less of me if she finds out I eat soap? That sort of thing can get one the wrong kind of attention.

      Thanks for the warm welcome — I’m having a good time already!


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